Sunday, November 21, 2010

Now I'm Really in Trouble

So, I was supposed to spend the day working on expense reports. If not that, then at least cleaning up the house. But my friend Edie showed up carrying two bags of fiber. Big bags of fiber. OK, really big bags of fiber. Nice fiber. Alpaca. Long. Crimpy. Soft. Light colored, which means it could be dyed.

Now I ask you, what am I to do? I am surrounded by fiber. There's the alpaca that I bought off of Ebay that has filled up my laundry baskets. And I have a rule, you know. You have to empty the laundry baskets before you can do the laundry. And Monday is laundry day. So I'm plugging through the six pounds of Ebay fiber, picking out the little bits of stuff and the short fiber. I've filled three laundry baskets and have one left to empty. Cannot do anything else if I'm to stay on schedule for doing the laundry tomorrow. Argh.

But, over in the middle of the living room, there's a rollag of green fiber. Now, this is all my fault. I asked the ladies at guild for advice. I have this collection of green 70% alpaca 30% wool fiber that I've been trying to sell, and not one person has shown any interest. So I asked the girls at guild, and they said I should blend it with something. So I was thinking dark blue and white. But, I mentioned the dilemma to my Mom this morning, and she said she'd like green yarn. Arrggh. And her birthday is this week. So now I'm thinking, "OK, finish up the one bin of white Canadian Ebay fiber, start the laundry, then start chugging through the green fiber and spin that up for Mom." Sounds like a plan, except my favorite spindle has caramel alpaca on it. Well I've got to finish that up, don't I?

So the Ebay fiber is in front of the tv, the caramel alpaca is on the chair next to me, the green fiber is in the living room, and then my friend Edie showed up. With those really big bags of MI-TY FINE alpaca fiber. And I can't let that just sit in the front hallway, so I started processing it. Step 1: stick it in the dryer and turn it on tumble and let it tumble some of the dust out. Well, that's going pretty well, but if you fill up the dryer with alpaca fiber, then you have to get the vacuum out to vacuum up the dirt that lands in the lint trap. And if you do that, then you might as well dust the laundry room up a little. And then, what do you do with the fiber that's coming out of the dryer, because it turns out that the dryer fluffs up the fiber, so now there are six bags and counting of the fiber that Edie brought.

So I thought, "OK, I'll hide the bags of new fiber behind the dining room table. Nobody will see it, because the dining room table has cans of paint for the walls sitting on top of it." Paint?

OK, so the plan is, paint the trim. But the paint cans don't really need to be gone until the first week of December, bcause I resisted the urge and didn't invite any extra company for Thanksgiving dinner. So that means we can all fit at the kitchen table, the dining room table can sit with the cans on it until the green fiber is done (must be done by Thanksgiving). So what are the chances that I can pick through all the fiber sitting behind the dining room table and paint the trim before the first week in December (when my sister and brother-in-law are coming)?

ummm... did I mention the Random Act of Kindness? Yes, yesterday when I was having such a snarky time at guild, I noticed a woman spinning some interesting fiber. So I went over and asked her about it, because I've been reading about making felt out of bunny, and I was wondering if she had ever made a project out of felted bunny, because I wanted to see what it felt like before I sacrificed a bunny's fiber. Turns out her fiber was 70% wool 30% bunny. And this nice lady rolled off a ball and gave it to me. "Oh my!" I cried. "Don't you want me to pay or it?" "Nope", she said, "Just see what you think of it." Yeah, that's the battle cry of fiber ladies all over America. It's how we all ended up in this fine kettle of fiber. And then she dug into her bag (yes, we're all toting bags of fiber around), pulled out a pile of bunny and told me to try that too. Isn't that sweet? How could I remain snarky given this lovely gesture?

So now that's sitting next to the green fiber, and I'm thinking that it just wouldn't be right to let a month go by without spinning up that lovely fiber, given to me by that very nice fiber girl.

So go ahead, wish me luck on my fine endeavor. I've been churning away all evening on the laundry basket of alpaca, and I swear it's getting taller, not shorter. And I keep running into the laundry room to pull out fiber from the dryer. The bags are stacking up behind the dining room table. I... must... go... on...

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