An Ode to Beets

An Ode to Beets

No thank you.

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I am attempting to change my evil eating ways, and that of my husband, and so have taken to making up a healthy smoothie every day for each of us. His, sadly, does not include any vegetables. He has historically claimed to have an allergy to squashes and squash-like vegetables. Personally, I think it is an aversion, rather than an allergy, but either way he won't eat them. And he is taking a medication that says he can't eat leafy vegetables. This leaves carrots and beets. I tried buying a big bag of carrots. Perhaps if I hid the roast beef under the carrots, he might consider eating the carrots, but as far as I can tell, I'm the only one eating the carrots.

So. That's when I came up with my best idea of all. Powdered beets. So I ordered up my latest round of smoothie ingredients from www.nuts.com, including powdered beets, put a teaspoon of beet powder into the smoothie along with all the other superfoods and seeds and what-not, handed the smoothie to my husband, and he took one sip and declared that he could not consume the smoothie. This was a first. Mind you, I've been presenting the most disgusting smoothies you can possibly imagine, varying in color from an insipid brown to a dank looking purple, and not once has this man said a bad thing. But the beets tipped the scales. He drew the line.

Not to be outdone, I concluded that I had given him too many beets. So I cut back to 1/4 of a teaspoon. Now we're up to 1/2 of a teaspoon. This wouldn't be such a bad thing, except that www.nuts.com tends to sell in pounds, not ounces. We'll be consuming that one pound of nasty smelling beet powder for the rest of our lives.

I couldn't help but notice that the beet industry is trying very hard to turn around public perception of their product:

For the record, I do not love beets. But I am a sharing, caring woman. So if you have been pining for powdered beets, I want you to know that I would be willing to share my beet powder. I would even be willing to send it across state lines in order to make your life just a little beet better. Just let me know...

10/27/15 - An addendum to the beet story: As my husband walks by today with his empty smoothie cup, he says, "That was one of your best." "Really? What was different?" "...it didn't taste like beets"

Must be it's time for me to bump up the beet allotment to 3/4 of a teaspoon... bua ha ha ha.